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The One thing I remembered. Just now. There were three ‘ones’ – on the dashboard clock. It struck me, almost like a joke…it was late and I was tired and weirding out. I get that way – kinda goofy - then I crash.
…guess that wasn’t appropriate. Sorry.
I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know I
was tumbling inside this can over and over and glass was flying. Got some in
this eye, which is why the patch. Didn’t know I was bleeding. No idea, Too
fast. Like waking up into a nightmare, you just don’t know. I thought I was
alone. Never thought about Mike or anyone else. No time. That business about
your life flashing? Bunk.
When we struck, we struck hard. Rock hard and bang that was
it. Blackness with a whack.
Whatever happened next…whenever it was after that…there were
some voices at some point, I heard but could not respond. I could think the
thoughts, but not speak the words. Like I was locked in my own cell and
everything I could hear was outside in the hall and no one could hear me
screaming from inside the walls. Not feel my body. Not feel my own pain. Then I was gone. That’s about it.
Blank now for the past…what?…how long’s it been?…and now I feel the pain and
need more drip…need the drip.
I don’t recall what I look like and I’m betting that it
isn’t the same as before. That traction contraption drove me mad, I do know
that. Torture. The tubes, the surgeries, the damn machines…the constant puff
and whiff of oxygen. The beep….beep…beep…maddening inside my broken body…my
fucked up head.
…sorry, I…
I hope you can bear looking at me. Am I grotesque from my
wounds? I…I…hope you don’t find me ghoulish.
They need to make me a new face – not the same, my cranium
rebuilt, new shape. They say they have a good woman in charge. I hope so. I’ll
need the help.
Mike said he could do it and I believed him. He knows that
canyon…he knew it…we blew it. Bad. 1:11. Oh, Mikey, what did we do?
