Sunday, October 10, 2010

Things you take to the grave...




A bag is left behind...what's inside, meant never to be seen, comes back to haunt them.


Victoria lay Marsh to rest on that drizzle gray day, with the wind whipping at their slickers and burberrys, while umbrellas trembled and where-under huddled a small flock, high on the green knoll atop the steep white cliffs. September 14 1947, Marsh Jurrey was put asunder. While heading out of port sailed a long low tanker, it’s black smoke trailing as it started its trek into the Channel. Which direction would she turn? Heymond wondered to himself. The sea was choppy, and caps danced from peak to peak and as far as the eye could see, which on a day as bitter as today, was not all that far. The salty blast stung their eyes, and caused the congregation to bow in reverence and preservation, hunched, tilting noticeably into the wind. Heymond’s riding goggles protected his sight and as he cleared them with finger wipes he saw the ship turn to the South. They had made some pointed comments about his choice to ride his motorbike from the ceremony to the hill, and in such weather! But Hey’ felt it was a suiting farewell since Marsh was the bike’s mechanic, and a darn good one at that, leaving him in a slight quandary about where to go for service now that the old man had passed.

Marsh had been a Sergeant Major for Montgomery’s troops in North Africa, in charge of the motor pool for the campaign against Rommel. Obvious from the gathering that he had been respected within a close rank of friends and war mates, of which there were a half dozen of so. There were four women, including his wife, daughter, mum, and one who stood apart and seemed unknown to the rest.

Hey’ eyed the woman. She was dressed well…too well for this small town crumbling from the weight of the war, goods scarce, fashion tattered. She was dressed simple, respectful, but also rich. They could all see it, and the questions hung heavy in the air as Marsh received the shovels’ final burden.
“And who would this be?”
 “What is she doing here?”
“What business does she have with old Marsh?”

 Come to think of it, he hadn’t seen her arrive. She was not in the chapel for the ceremony, he would know. He had been an usher and stood facing the congregation until dismissal, at which time he walked briskly up the aisle and met them all at the door as they exited; assisting ladies with coats, gents with umbrellas, then holding the door open against the blasting winds. He watched as they each slipped into one of four cars, and followed on his motorbike as they slid their way up the muddy hill road to the gravesite.

Hey’ found her to be mysterious.  

Someone rudely grabbed his arm and broke his reverie. “Heymond, come to the house. Kate has requested it. She has an errand to be run.” It was Marsh’s stepson Tate. Marsh never cared for Tate, because he knew Tate looked down upon him. His real father, an Earl, was killed in a bomber run. He was an Ace in the Queen’s own, and Tate bore the bloodlines.
“I…I don’t know, I have obligations.” Which was true.
“Don’t disappoint her, Hey’”
Hey’ walked across the lawn to Victoria’s side and took her hand and thanked for the invitation, that it meant a lot, that it had been an honor knowing Marsh, but that he had obligations. She hugged him tight and reminded him that he was one of Marsh’s favorites, ever since they had moved here seventeen years ago. Marsh knew that he liked the lad even though Heymond was a child at the time. An uruly child at that.
“Marsh would want you to get-on-with-it. And I concur.”
“Thank you. I…”
“I know.”

Four miles down the highway, having got a late start, Hey’ gained on the black sedan she had departed in. It had appeared just at the top of the hill, just above the gathering. That’s how she had arrived, from the upper road, over the crest and that’s how she left. Quiet, and quick. Now, closing on the auto as it sped through the rain, into the wind, blinding him with the spray of it’s perilous wake, he zigzagged desperately looking for a trench or hollow in the sedan’s backwash. Finally he found a groove just inside the left rear fender, at the rear of the driver and just outside the rear window. Then in that window she turned to look back at him. Was she smiling? Perhaps, but then she wiped a tear. The moment just fractions within a blurr of whipping rain and swirling drafts. Hey tried to swing wide but his headlight caught the wide board barricade immediately ahead and he swung back in but the sedan did not respond as quickly. The driver’s hard steer barely broke the momentum as the wheels failed to grip, sending the mass in motion, through the barricade flying into the harsh darkness. Hey’ lost control of his bike, shocked by the sight, he plowed into the opposite embankment, sending him skyward until landing in a muddy heap, while the bike careened back across the road again and cut it’s own path up and out into the black gorge.


He had been out for a while, he thought. He came back to consciousness as if from a nights sleep, but wondering why it was raining in his bedroom...then thought maybe shower... Realizing he was elsewhere but with no knowledge of where that might be. A woman called out from the night. Was it an illusion of the wind or…? It came again. Real. He sensed a direction, and turned back behind him. In a flash of lightning he saw the shattered barricade and from beyond them a call came once again. Hey’ tried to rise but his legs buckled then slid away from beneath him. He landed awkward with legs crossed and askew and immediately felt the pain of his fractured pelvis. “Auuuuuuggghhh.” He screamed into the wind, and the wind answered, “Help us!”

At the wreckage, he has crawled across roadway and slid gingerly down wet hillside to get there –the driver is nowhere to be found but his door sprung out, hinges bent and broken, had been tossed out no doubt. And inside the inverted cab, she lay bloody on the interior roof, now it’s floor.
“I can’t die like this. I came to say goodbye. I should not have come. I am too young, please don’t let me die here like this.” Her voice grew more weary the more she spoke but she continued to speak as if to live, making a noise, communicating, coherent, breathing, living…she grasped it, she rabbled, she shuddered, she died. But before she died she uttered her last words and they were, “the satchel…must…”
The satchel whose leather strap was twisted around her arm, and spattered with her blood, probably buffeted her and enabled her to survive the immediate impact, but she bled freely and succumbed.
He tenderly extricated the satchel strap from around her broken arm and slid back out into the rain clutching the bag like a child it’s doll. A light swung past him and illuminated the wreckage and a voice called out. He turned to look and there she was once again peering out in his direction, pressed against the glass but not blinking, and the voice...was not hers. This time the pain and light crescendoed, and he did not fight for consciousness and accepted his blackout.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

EYES ALL OVER

 



wind blows quiet

anticipation rising

night air

from the sea

born the fog

come rolling

o’er the town

damp air

down the alley

came a creeping

a creep named Erwin

sneaking

breathing hard

lungs constricted

with fear

drenched air

erwin angered

by her ignorance

could bear her dullness

no more

he strangled her


scarce air


lifted her

and dangled her

threw her down

with a thud

nary a sound

devoid of blood

still air

got to run

someone saw him

round the corner

sweating bad

eyes all over

 panic fills
 the air



























Friday, September 24, 2010

THE TALLY




THE TALLY OF THE DALLIANCE


The score you thought you made a hundred times
With a flurry mix of couplings
A whirring of flesh
Nothing better
The carnal mess
In a blender of desire
Resulting only in
A landfill of lies
Wasted years of empty pleasure
Spent and discarded
Like a used french letter

Coming back to pull your heart
down to your crotch
From the weight of the dalliance
And the truth in the lie
The wrong heart has been beating all this time
You follow the throb wherever it goes
And you’ve never been lost before
...you were
but how were you to know?
Using the wrong compass
while traveling the wrong road
All those twats…
The pussys
The cunts
The clits
The tits
The boobs
The nips
The booty
the ass
all that
and you left
wantin’ for more
the blowjobs
the butt fucks
goin’ down on
something new
didn’t add up
to much after
after you were through
twas then that
you knew
you are only
what you spew
swallow
spit
wipe
or piss away

You used to break their hearts
And now they break your balls

but now when the pressure is applied
there is no reason to recoil
no necessity to lie
or emotions to feign
Numb sacks after all
Have a great capacity
for pain
which fills the void
and assuages the shame

Time to Tally the Dalli', there, Ace!
Zippo
Nada
zilch
You lose
You can finally relent
Your buddy
the carnal compass
can rest
because your semen bank
Has been looted
and you
have been spent

First you can’t keep your fly up
Then it’s an effort to try
Next thing you dry up
and finally you die



Friday, September 17, 2010

MULCH for CONCRETE - #2




L A U S   K A U S


I take comfort in my vices. It’s the only thing that keeps me going. There is no one else to sooth me, to calm, to give me safe harbor. If I crave booz, so what? If I smoke a joint, who cares? If I pop a pill…or a hooker, or even a housewife, what’s the difference? Let me be. I don’t have a virgin mary or a mother theresa to save my soul. It’s too late and frankly I don’t care. It is My self destruction, it is my Own disillusion. It is my garden of sin so don’t come tromping in with your heavy boots and expect that you will save me. I don’t require salvation. Move along. Find another lost soul who might ask directions to shelter, I am not looking. I have mine. Label me a lost cause and move along. Shake your head in disbelief, but bear no sadness or regret. You do not owe me a thing and I expect nothing. You are not your brother’s keeper and I am not your brother. Move along. 

LA LUNA




La Luna met the dogs as she crested the hill overlooking San Juan Portio. She was so looking forward to slipping in silently and seeing her reflections in the bay below - mirror glass still, a cool pool of luster on which to preen, shimmering, anxious and waiting to take her in. Instead, Her elegance met with the madding howl of a pack of baying beasts shredding tranquility and snapping at the nerves.  The hounds of Mad Sol, would have none of this nightly visitation, none of it at all. HE would have her slip by, a mere sliver of herself, but she did so love to bloom, and tonight was in full glow. A monthly tidal episode neither one could control. A cold dark orb, he called her…void of anything of life. But he followed her, as others do – no more special in his majesty, than she will allow or give him credit for.  And for the ruler of all, this was enough. He would rage in the frustration of his need but longed to glimpse her shadow, linger and taste the scent of her passing. La Luna was here but moments ago. We shared the same air.






LILLY'S BIRD






Lilly's little bird,
Pale and frail
As it could be,
Sang sweet
Daily
Perched inside
It’s narrow
Round cage
Though thin
Its song
Reedy it’s
Tiny tweet
Earnest it
Did repeat
And repeat
And repeat
Tweet
tweet tweet
tweet tweet
retweet, retweet, retweet…
Through rice-paper walls
All day long
it’s Tinny Tune
Whistled
Like a teapot
It’s steam
Endless and
Relentless
so frantic, it seemed
Until the day I screamed
And Lilly screamed back
As the balance tipped
And judgment snapped
The heat relentless
Our goodwill sapped
And pretty soon
It went from room
To room
Out to the hall
We screamed
We vented
Over panic bird calls
While she swore
I pounded walls
She slammed the door
To end it all
And from that day
It was heard no more
Though I miss it now
I have to wonder
Did she set it free?
Or
Put it under
The fate
I must admit
The fault
You may convict
Shame sits
As the silence now
Rests heavy
with me
Lilly never speaks
When oddly we meet
There is no look
Nor nod from
The Cold old bird
Now grown wary
She utters
Nary a peep
And as a gentleman,
I know not to tarry
Or to Ruffle
Her feathers
Never more
The canary
Next door.